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Wednesday, August 16, 2006 

The Top Five Reasons You Can't Blame...

With all of the fanfare preceding her entrance into the business Teagan Presley should be, by now, one of the most recognizable faces in adult. Emerging out of the clear blue in late 2003 (just in time to catch everyone's eye at AEE 2004 before they even saw any of her work) the then-18-year-old barely legal Britney Spears lookalike (an unfair comparison, to be honest, spawned more by the schoolgirl attire Presley seemed to prefer wearing early on more than any actual physical similarities) had legions of soon-to-be fans and ardent admirers anticipating the release of her first scenes.

While her early performances were proof-positive that the young-in-age and new to the "performing arts" Presley was a mere novice (by her own admission, she only had sex with three guys before porn) and still very much green in front of the camera, her fanboys kept an unbelievably long thread going in her honor at Adult DVD Talk and the as-of-yet undeserved hype machine kept right on rolling. She's provided her fans (the ones able to overlook her pained grimace and timid virgin-like performances. Think: her face throughout her entire scene in Lethal-Hardcore's Just Turned 18) a few strokable perfs: Jules Jordan's Weapons of Ass Destruction 3, Chris Streams' Internal Cumbustion 4 and Joey Silvera's Service Animals 18. These only served to raise her profile and soon the internet darling was snatched up and signed to an exclusive contract by Digital Playground (and received the requisite breast implants soon thereafter). Since that time, they've released a whopping five movies featuring her, one of which is one of their signature Virtual Sex DVDs. Unfortunately, all of these outings have been uneventful, proving that the fanboy faithful were once again overzealous in their coronation of a new Queen much like they have lately been in a hurry to hand the crown to the likes of Amy Ried and the Sashas -- Knox and Grey and constantly insisting that Taryn Thomas and Hillary Scott are the Second Coming.

But is any of this Teagan's fault? Not quite. And here are the five reasons why you can't lay this all at her feet:

5. Hype: There was almost no way someone as inexperienced as Teagan could immediately live up to the lofty expectations placed upon her. Touted as "The Next Big Thing" based solely on her looks before she ever stepped foot on a set or anyone actually saw her in action, perhaps the naive youngster herself bought into the overwhelming hype and thus didn't feel as compelled to give her all since her name was already on everyone's lips and she was in such demand.

4. Outside Distractions: Not long after signing to Digital Playground, Teagan in an ironic twist, became pregnant only a few months after her celebrity doppleganger (Spears gave birth in Sept '05, Presley in November of that year). So far, motherhood has managed to fade both stars appeal and the time off wasn't helpful to either of their careers. An Evil Angel director/performer like Belladonna might have the option of continuing to perform while with child but a Digital Playground contract star does not. Sidelined, Teagan's popularity suffered and fan chatter concerning her waned as she remained increasingly out of the public eye.

3. Lack of Direction: Pre-Digital Playground, at the start of her gonzo "career", who was handling Teagan's business? Who was advising her and around to make the hard decisions an 18-year-old can't and shouldn't be counted on to make on their own? Without handlers to warn her against doing otherwise, Teagan was only 30-40 movies in before we had seen her do it all including the two acts most new starlets hold off on until they can find a way to get paid for it being their "first": anal and interracial. Teagan took Mr. Marcus and Brian Pumper, two black male performers, in her ass in Anabolic's Up Your Ass 22 before I even knew she existed. Where on Earth were the people to steer Teagan down the right path back then?

2. Her Looks: Teagan's exceptional beauty may have been part of her undoing. Attractive women aren't a rarity in this business but when one comes along as striking as Teagan, everyone wants a piece of her (ask the Jenna Jamesons and Tera Patricks of the world). In addition to being on nearly every box cover of every movie she took part in, the very photogenic Teagan had other obligations. Interviews, photo shoots, various press events, signings and other opportunities that involve the mainstream media don't leave a lot of time for actual "work."

1. Behind Her Time: You read that right. Teagan definitely wasn't AHEAD of her time. The fact is and unfortunately for Teagan, she came along at a time where nearly every other performer working was stronger than her. Her competition was simply too great. Katja Kassin, Lauren Phoenix, Katrina Kraven, Tiana Lynn...the list goes on and on. Nearly every single one of her peers outworked her onscreen. Both her own close friend Nadia Styles and a bespectacled, formerly flat-chested Eva Angelina outshone her in Teen Dreams 7 and she was literally left in the dust when placed side-by-side with Ariana Jollee in Share the Load and then embarrassed again working alongside Eva Angelina in Cum Swapping Sluts 7. Any movie you picked up with Teagan in the cast, she was guaranteed to always be the least-experienced and most sexually-inhibited member and you could count on her to have the most mediocre scene of all of those included, regardless of whether her devoted faithful wanted to admit it or not.

You also have to mention one of her highlights, her scene in Anal P.O.V. opposite Erik Everhard. It could be that this scene showed Teagan at the very height of her teen appeal.

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