Saturday, April 29, 2006 

Who's Gonna Take The Weight???

Between television, magazines and men, it's a wonder the average woman isn't insane by the time she's twenty-one. But there are options...

Today there is so much pressure on women to maintain a certain physical appearance. Society impresses upon them this image of a "perfect" body and forces unrealistic expectations not just on women but on anyone who dares to lay eyes on a woman. Young boys grow up believing every woman should be built like Carmen Electra and if they're not? Well, they're fat and lazy and it's their own fault. There's no such thing as genetics or just being naturally big-boned to a 10-year-old snot who's hellbent on being mean to his obese classmate on a schoolyard playground. It doesn't seem to occur to most that there are men, believe it or not, who DON'T want a woman with a frame similar to that of a 12-year-old to lie down next to on a Friday night. It's hard enough to deal with all these things as just a regular, everyday, average lady. But imagine if your looks are your livelihood.

Take Dora and Kimmie Lee.

Dora was a dominatrix and a looker. Radiant copper skin, long dark shiny hair and voluptuously built; curvy and inviting with the sexiest pair of full and pouty lips I've ever seen. She had the type of Amazonian physique The Commodores sang about. But it seemed she was never happy with herself, least of all with her body. It was as if she almost became obsessed with dropping weight and altering her appearance to compete with the anorexic and waifish blondes she saw getting steady work in her field. It didn't seem to matter to her that she was one of the most witty, intelligent and creative people I've ever met or had the pleasure of talking to. What mattered to her was looking like what she thought the world wanted her to so she could work more often and of course, make more money. Even as a finger-thin, bottle-blonde shell of her former self, Dora didn't find happiness. Long story short, a host of personal problems led to hard drugs and then severe depression which ultimately culminated in her tragic suicide. I only wish it didn't take her hitting rock bottom and that she had realized how special she was to a lot of people who cared so much about her. Her personality carried so much more weight than her looks.

Then you have Kimmie. A hot amateur who debuted doing web content on the Bang Bros Ass Parade and Big Tits, Round Asses websites, Kimmie was a newbie with an awesome body and a girl-next-door face comparable in cuteness to Isabella Soprano of HBO's Cathouse fame. She did a few more random websites and a handful of movies while she was in this fantastic shape and then something happpened. I don't know whether she just took some time off, had a kid or what but when I saw Kimmie again, she had ballooned to the point where I didn't even recognize her on her then-agent's modelling website. A friend had to convince me it was the same girl by pointing out her tattoos. But Kimmie didn't shy away from the business. Oh no. She simply got work in the movies where she best fit: SCALE BUSTIN' BABES, CHUNKY CHICKS, CHUBBY CHASERS and a gang of Evasive Angels and West Coast Productions skin flicks where the themes were thick white girls with phat asses. Life handed Kimmie lemons and she whipped them into old-fashioned Country Time.

If Davina Hardman (Dave Hardman's mom) can get booked for a scene or two here and there, there's no reason in the world any woman out there should feel self-conscious about any part of their bodies. One of the biggest current stars in the business today is Katja Kassin, someone who was constantly and continuously told there wasn't any room in adult for girls with a body like hers. Now look at her. I guess the point I'm trying to make is there's room out here for everyone, every shape and size. Love yourself. Don't let others dictate to you how to feel about how you look. Be proud, have self-confidence. Because somewhere out there, regardless of what some sleazy agent or some mean-spirited fan may say, someone just picked a movie up with you on the front or back boxcover, saw you and it sent blood to all the right places. And he's walking up to the counter right now, movie in hand, ready to buy or rent it just to see you.